Busy

I seem to stay busy.  Between work, kids, house and helping take care of my mom and all lifes little errands and pulls....Man...I just want a vacation. 

I'm trying to teach myself some girly shit in what little down time I have at night...which is hard, for the obvious fact that I'm just not very girly despite my whinnying and crying about dumb, menial, ridiculous circumstances.  The past few days I've been looking up do it yourself videos on how to do your own acrylic nails and waxing on youtube.  Its...much harder than what the videos make you believe.  I did my own acrylic fill in on my nails and it was almost a disaster.  Gladly though I paid attention and was able to fix them despite my horrible and shaky eye hand coordination. I've been doing my own eyebrows for some time but really have never had the nerve to try else where with the exception of one drunken time...that of course doesn't count.  I'm a chicken shit...so I've yet to try.  Maybe I will get up the gall to do my twat tonight.  :D

I finally got to spend some time with one of my best friends Juleah.  It was nice to watch out kids play and catch up on much needed conversation.  Mark came along and had a good time too.  Juleah made this amazing bacon and lentil soup and I asked her advice about things that were bothering me. She is always nonjudgmental and insightful.  It was a very nice, laid back and enjoyable visit.  I need to go again soon. 

I haven't been able to talk to Mary much.  :(  I miss her terribly.  I need to stop passing out and waking up at times when I'm afraid to call her and she never does because of my work schedules.  I need to make the time tomorrow.  I can't wait for summer.  Hopefully we will be able to get together a little bit more often. 

I miss E.  I haven't talked to him either.  I figure he is busy with his new job and recent shows I know he has had.  Otherwise he may be irritated with my attitude towards life and situations.  I'm not sure.  I'm also starting to think I'm one of those people where I'm out of sight and out of mind,,which is upsetting considering.  I at times wish I could do that with people I care about and love. Not a day goes by I don't wonder what they are doing and how they are getting along.  Tis life.  I just hope I am just making ridiculous assumptions although advice about it from other friends hasn't made me feel much better.  I dunno. 

My kids are doing amazing.  Breanna is excited for summer to get here and looks forward to kindergarten.  Everyday she has been bringing home new artwork and its all very good.  I see a lot of potential in a lot of things with my daughter and pray that she takes each one of them and grasps it tight.
Lucian...haha.  He cracks me up.  Typical into everything and very curious little boy.  He has gotten a sneaky streak lately which can be very cute..and at the same time make me have a heart attack at some of the things he tries to do or get into when your back is turned for a second.  I love them both dearly. 

Mark.  Mark is Mark.  He is getting better.  Our relationship is still where its always at...a stand still.  Lately he has been bringing me home little presents like cards and stuff.  Its cute and I appreciate them.  I just don't want him to think that buying me stuff is going to fix things.  I don't want to hurt his feelings just in case he is just trying to be genuinely nice and caring.  Sigh  Once again.  I dunno. 

Thats it for today folks.  Time to hit the sack.